all i wanted.

The only thing I wanted for today was hubby to be unconditionally nice to me.  That’s it.  And evidently, even that was too much to ask for.  Yes, he did get up with Baby without so much as a complaint, but that was about all he did.  Oh, he did give me two cards from her, yet he spelled her name wrong.  Seriously.  How does he not know how to spell her name?  sigh.  We then got up and went to the local fire department for a pancake breakfast.  Sounds nice and delightful, doesn’t it?  Well, sure, if he would have paid and would have served me.  Instead, it was the other way around.  Sure, I could have said something, but that’s not really the point.  I guess the coup de grace is that he had me get HIS mother a $60 gift and he got me nothing.  That’s what hurt the most.  And he got her a very kind, sentimental card.  I am beyond hurt.  Yes, I realize I am not his mother, but for God’s sake.  It’s my very first Mother’s Day.  He could have done something nice.  And really, if he was just kind to me, that would have been more than enough.

Words cut deeper than anything.  Who ever said “stick and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” never met Hubby.  Seriously.  The other day we were arguing over finances and he said “then divorce me and I will fight for FULL custody over Baby.”  WTF.  I still can’t shake that.  I mean, really.  I don’t fight like that.  I am so miserable.  I love Baby more than anything in the entire world.  She is the absolute light of my life and I cannot imagine life without her.  She is darling and sweet and special and spunky.  For him to even threaten that, well, I don’t know how to handle that.  I do realize we were fighting and those were fighting words, but that is no excuse.  I will not forgive, nor will I forget, that he ever said that.  Sure, we talked about it later and I told him he is never allowed to say that again, but hell, if he said it once, what is going to stop him from saying that again?  I have no idea what possesses him to think that way.

I know that there are a lot of positive things in my life so I don’t want to dwell on the negative.  But this has got to stop.  Besides.  I have to start getting ready to spend the day with his family.  wonderful.

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4 responses to this post.

  1. I’ve had a little wine so I feel uninhibited enough to ask is there ANYTHING good about this guy? He seems like an emotionally abusive nightmare. You might want to consider kicking his ass to the curb before your daughter is old enough to start thinking “This is how men should be.” Sorry 😦

  2. I think his psycho family living so close to you guys makes things even worse. I think you should move far away and see what happens. And since I live far away, you could just move here! Call if you need to chat or vent or make arrangements to come visit. I’m so sorry, girlie. Love on that baby of yours and know that you are an AMAZING Mommy!

  3. Oh, Wendy. Don’t be sorry. Never be sorry. He is very emotionally abusive. And, yes. He does have good qualities. He is very funny, has a quick with, is very smart and good looking to boot. He is well educated and can think on his feet. He has a good job and has always been employable, so he can provide financially for the family. However, the things that come out of his mouth seem to be worse than all of the good things combined. He can do nice things, but only when he wants to. I think that is the worst part because I KNOW that he has it in him to be great, but he is just entirely too selfish to be so. He thinks about himself first Every.Single.Time. and that is the biggest problem. I just don’t know what to do anymore. I think I am going to start looking for a marriage counselor. I won’t give up so easily, especially since Baby is involved.

  4. I hope that you guys will go and see a counselor. I think it would help a lot. Thinking of you!

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