fng & tweedledee

so a fire alarm just went off here at work. it was loud and annoying, like fire alarms tend to be. the alarm only sounded a few times and since no one moved, i figured it was safe to stay where i was.

fng came out of her office, somewhat freaked out and said

“well, we better get moving”

um..where to?

“well, don’t you hear the fire alarm? they don’t go off for no reason, now.”

um, yes they do. it’s called a drill. haven’t you ever been someplace where there’s a fire drill? evidently not. when i worked at the capitol we had to walk so far away for our damn drills. it wasted a lot of time and i guarentee, people would have freaked out so much that the drill would have made no difference at all. but i digress.

it’s just so odd to me that fng thought i had two heads when i said todays alarm was a drill. but, since no one moved from their desks, i have no idea what actually happened, nor do i really care.

on another note, i ended up having lunch the same time as tweedledee did. she and this other gal were talking about going to arizona together this weekend. a little odd.

then tweedledee commented that she’s been going to the tanning salon for about a week now to get ready for the trip and that all she wants to do is lay out by the pool in her bathing suit. ewww. that would be fine is she was um…how do i put this nicely…not so gross.

i bet she will be wearing a two-piece suit, too.

she’s very overweight and honestly believes she’s a size 2. it’s just wrong. i have a few girlfriends who are overweight and dress so nice and look great all the time. tweedledee is not one of these girls. he wears the most hideaously tight, short and awkward outfits when she clearly should not be.

i shutter to think what she will look like by the pool. a beached whale is what i am invisioning. yeah, yeah, i’m going to hell. but see, the difference is, she thinks she small and beautiful, when she’s fat and ugly. she doesn’t do herself any justice. she could totally look nice and put together, with outfits that actually are meant for size, but nope. she has to go and look like a fool. it’s really sad because it so doesn’t have to be this way at all.

sadly, i doubt there is any real hope for her as no one will say anything to her for fear of her sitting on them. that is just wrong!


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